Heidi Klum: "A Day At The Beach"

Heidi Klum

A Day At The Beach

Subtitled:
"Can I Lick That Sand Out Of There For You?"

"None Of These People Here Are Pretty

And No One's Said Anything About My Bubble!?!?
I Blow & Blow & Blow.  Everybody Watches Me Blow
But No One Compliments Me On How It Grows Large.

You Will Go To The Beach With Me.

I Never Wear Clothing And  You Will Enjoy Staring
At My Supple, Perky Breasts!"

"I'm Pretty Sure The Beach Is Down There
Next To The Water...Near That Sand"

News Bulletin:
A Vote Was Taken In Parliment Today.
The Overwhelming Majority Wish To See Heidi
Run Into The Ocean Several More Times.
We Understand A Special "Jiggle Coalition" Has Been Set
Up To Lobby For Jogging Down The Beach As Well.

Coming Up:
Bill Clinton On A Diplomatic Mission To Persuade
Jennifer Love Hewitt
In to Showing Us Something...Anything
Before It All Goes To Hell.
 
In A Statement From Miss Hewitt,
"No, They're Mine, All Mine"
Hewitt Admits Things Came Close After A Recent
Encounter With A Mix Of Peach Schnapps
And Wet Nail Polish (Shown Here):

Well, That Was A Close One Larry. 

I'd Like To Ask Our Camera Man To Zoom In to

See If We May Have Gotten

Anything Our Competitors Have Missed.

"Larry...I Have To Ask!!! Do I See Rim??? 

I Think I See Rim!!?

According To The Former President; A Full On 
Nipple Slip May Soon Be In The Offing.

"Told You You Would Like Them!
They Are Spectacular Aren't They?
Now Be A Dear & Go Get Me A Martini...

And A Banana Daiquiri For My Monkee...
Shaken, Not Stirred"

"Seal Saw Adrianne Curry Do This Picture And Thought It Looked Cool. He Says My Shot Looks Bettter. 

What Do You Think?

Adrianne

Me

Adrianne

Me

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ADRIANNE???

WHAT WOULD A MONKEE KNOW? 

And Stop Chewing On Those Damn It!!!

I Paid Good Money For Those!

That's It Monkee! 

 I'm Sending You To Live With Seal And That

Husband Stealing Be-atch Of His Blake Lively. 

She If She'll Put Up With You Throwing Shit At Her Mother! I Guarantee She Won't Let You Have Her Nipples For Lunch.

Famous For:

• American Supermodel
• Victoria Secret's Angel
• Career Took Off When She Got The Cover Of The 1998 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition
• Her Nickname: "The Body"
• Married Singer Seal In 2005. He Divorced Her In 2012...

 Leading Friends, Family & World Leaders
To Believe Seal Had Lost His Mind Or
Was Verging On Coming Out Of The Closet?!?!?! 
Come On Seal, "Look At This!':

And She Even Comes With Her Own Monkee!

By The Way My Little Monkee, Did You Know That Susan Dey Can Play The Tamborine! 

You Two Should Get Together And Jam At Our Place.

And Stop Chewing On Those Or I'll Take Your

Guitar Away When We Get Home.

 

Heidi Is Also Famous As Host Of

"Project Runway" (2004-Current)

"I Hope That's A Taco Truck Over There"

"Hey, If You Buy A Burrito From The

Guy In The Taco Truck He'll Give You A Hat!"  And He Invited Me To Come Back.  Wants To Teach Me To Paint"

"Wow, That Taco Sales Guy Loves To Paint!  And He Really Takes His Time Getting To Every Nook &...
How You Say, Cragnee"

"Between All The Mexican Food & Beer

I'm Not Feeling So Good.

Do I Suddenly Look Fat?

I Need A Nap."



Have We Met?"

"I'm Pretty Funny, Huh!"

"Guess Not"

"Should My Monkee Be Down There?"

"Weird Day At The Beach This Week"



Hedy Lamarr Born 100 Years Ago (1913)

Hedy Lamarr

Born 100 Years Ago (1913)

Opps! Sorry! I Thought You Said

"Hedly Lamarr"!

Many Believed Hedy Lamarr Was The Most Beautiful Actress Of Her Time. Among The Believers Was

Louis B. Mayer, Studio Boss For MGM.

Hedy Lamarr Would Have Been 100 Years Old In 2013 Had She Survived.  Probably Still Be Running Around Naked But The Effect Wouldn't Be The Same.

 

The Picture Above (Showing Hedy Lamarr Running Through The Woods) Was The "Naked Run Heard 'Round The World!" It Was Promoted As The 1st Nude Scene In A Major Motion Picture.  German Actress Hedy Lamarr not only ran around naked but simulated masturbation on camera as well. 

That act made headlines around the world getting her a Hollywood contract.  The movie was "Ecstacy" (1933).  In fact, two other foreign films had beaten her to the punch but they didn't get the press that Hedy Lamarr and "Ecstacy" received.

Hedy was the "IT Girl" of her time;

the biggest star in Hollywood. 

Being happy to show her "Naughty Bits" probably didn't hurt.

Hedy Lamarr's career was so big that artists worldwide painted her likeness while singers wrote and sang of her beauty. The following is just a few samples of the greatness that was Miss Lamarr in the eyes of the public.  Just goes to show what whipping out your "Ta-Ta's" in public will do for you.  A lesson learned well by many of today's "Stars" famous for nothing other than whipping it out and/or stuffing it in then "accidentally" having pics "leaked". 
Personally, I Think It's A Good Policy"

Famous For:

• Supposed 1st Nude Scene Recorded On Film For A Major Motion Picture. Definitely The 1st To Show A Woman Simulate Orgasm Through Use Of A Showerhead. Sorry, There Were No Showerheads?  OK, Through Use Of A Well Pump In The Front Yard.
• Made Headlines For Turning Down The Leads In Both Gaslight (1940) and Casablanca (1942); At The Time, Two Of The Largest Hits In Movie History.   "Casablanca" Remains (even today) One Of The Outstanding Films In American History. I Believe It Would Have Been Even Bigger Had Hedy (as Ilsa) Shown Up Naked At Rick's Place and Told Dooley To "Play It Again".
• "Ecstacy" (1933)
• "Boomtown" (1940)
• "Ziegfield Girl" (1941)
• Cecil B. DeMille's "Samson And Delilah", The Highest Grossing Film Of 1949

Hedy & Clark Gable

Hedy Lamarr Sued Mel Brooks Claiming Invasion Of Privacy Over The Use Of The Name "Headly Lamarr" in the Film; "Blazing Saddles". Brooks Settled For A Small Amount. Heady became famous for her law suits over time. Harvey Korman Played "Hedly Lamarr" In The Movie.

 

 



WHAT!?! You Thought He Was The Woman On The Right? 

 

Here's Where It Gets Really Weird! 

Hedy (seen above), was the co-inventor (with composer George Antheil) of the earliest known form of the telecommunications method known as "frequency hopping" which used a piano roll to change between 88 frequencies and was intended to make radio-guided torpedoes harder for enemies to detect or to jam.

I Have No Idea What That Means But I'm Still Impressed.

So she was the hottest actress, inventor, law suit

happy, clothes averse babe of the early 1900s.

AND...Hedy's Face Is On The Cover Of Modern Day

Product "Corel Draw" In Germany (below) ???

 

 



Susan Dey "The Partridge Babe"

Susan Dey

"The Partridge Babe"

Raise Your Hand If You Fell In Love With Laurie Partridge The First Time She Faked Playing An Instrument &
Lip Synced "Come On, Get Happy?

Now That Just Made Things Worse!!!  Can I Keep Her?

Apple Reports Latest Follow Up To I Pad 137 To Be

Susan Dey Sex Droid

Famous For:

• Hottest Member Of The Partridge Family.  The Cowsills Refused A TV Contract So The Network Made Up A Band. They Got The Idea After The Monkees Had So Much Success Putting Together A Bunch Of Strangers Who Couldn't Sing.
• Pretending To Play The Piano, Hammond Organ (insert joke here) and harmonize.  I do think she had the tamberine nailed though but a monkee could do that.  I think Heidi Klum taught her monkee to play bongo.
• See Heidi Klum's Monkee Here
• Playing "Hide The Meat Whistle" with David Cassidy (or so David would have us believe).
• Maybe That's The Hammond Organ Susan Played. (See, I Knew There Was Something There)
• "The Partridge Family" (1970-1974)
• "LA Law" (1986-1992)

Now Get Your Cuteness Out Of Here Before I Call The Cops!